Mollie Payne
My first impulse was to make contrasting images of brutal, raw, sexuality with light, delicate, feminine aesthetics: sado-masochism, but perhaps not literal, looking at restraints as an analogy rather than a reality. I wanted to explore my own discomfort, as a human being. As I developed the work, it became less about sex (even though still depicting sexual themes) and started to become more about chaos and sanity. I started to put myself more in the work; my subjects had some resemblance to me, but this was not initially intentional.
The media I chose reflected the visual research I was following and moving from watercolour and acrylic to oil paint allowed me to use the process as a means to develop my ideas as they occurred – I used the way oil paint dries so slowly to change the images as I painted. This enabled me to employ techniques like automatic drawing to allow images to emerge.
My work is intended to “return the gaze”, and to engage the viewer in acknowledging an inner reality. It is an exploration into women’s sexuality and the female form, but it is also a more general one into the human condition. I have found that I can use painting as a means of self-discovery and I hope to develop it further in the future.
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